Catholics Aren't the Best People to Ask About This

Lady writes:

I have a question which is going to pertain to something having to do with my husband and family and all the like but mostly probably myself. I am trying to be a very virtuous woman as the Bible does instruct me to but my husband likes me to not be so virtuous in ways I do not think the bible likes. For instance he likes me to wear lewd clothing that does not allow for modesty even though I know that the whores on the Vegas strip are most likely the women he wants me to start to look like for fun even though it is only in the house he wants me to be so provocative. Have you ever see these women who dress as if they are going swimming at any moment because these are the women he probably likes for me to aspire to so you know what I mean. Their shorts may as well be underwear and their top may as well not be there and a virtuous woman dresses in another way and has class. If we have children this will not make for an excellent example of modesty and womanhood and female ways of perperness. Thank you!

Well, Lady, you're quite welcome.

If I'm understanding correctly, I think what you're asking is if it's considered Biblically proper to dress in provocative lingerie for your husband.

Because I'm not an expert on literal Scripture interpretation, I looked up what I could about Bible references to lingerie. What I found was that the Good Book doesn't reference dressing for sexual purposes directly - in fact, the Bible doesn't say very much specifically about sexual habits at all. The Marriage Bed, a site for married Christian couples, outlines what the Bible has to say about sexuality within marriage, and it doesn't look like lingerie should be considered a problem.

The Bible does seem to have quite a lot to say on the subject of modesty, but none of it has to do with the marital relationship.

I think that if your husband's request truly bothers you on a spiritual level, you should seek some answers from your clergyman; he'll be able to guide you and your husband to a happy compromise in this matter.

My own opinion is that there is nothing improper in wearing something visually enticing for your husband. Good sex helps build a good marriage, and good sex thrives on novelty. Different positions, different clothing, different locations - all of these help keep the spice in your relationship. Don't be afraid to experiment with new ways of expressing your love.

Good luck, and keep us posted!